Key lessons for success

My mother replied to an e-mail in which I mentioned that my lawn mower is at the repairers, just at the time when I need it most. My mother is 80 years old and her lawn is bigger than a full size tennis court, with additional grass paths and grass covered orchards. In her reply she gives me seven valuable lessons in four lines of text, amazing:

Here’s what she wrote:

Harley,

Can't you borrow a mower from a neighbour, friend or relative? I get my mowers serviced in the winter when it is 10% cheaper, I must admit that Judith takes it for me to where she gets her machines serviced. We cut all the grass today, using the big machine to pick up the leaves etc. Then I can use my mulcher, a smaller, manageable size with no grass box to empty, so much quicker.

Have a good weekend,

Love Mum xxx

The seven lessons:
Lesson one: be resourceful
Lesson two: solve the real problem and don’t complain
Llesson three: plan ahead
Lesson four: save on bottom line costs
Lesson five: delegate and get the task done,
Lesson six: be efficient; use the right tool for job
Lesson seven: put the right tools in the hands of the right employees

Here’s my reply:

Mum,

Me and grass, we have a love / hate relationship – I try to ignore it and hope it goes away, it ignores me and keeps on growing!

Following your email I have put an annually reoccurring reminder in my computer to take the lawn mower in for a service on the first Saturday of December every year.

I think human evolution takes so long purely because the things we should do to improve, we don’t do – because for the most of us, planning ahead is not natural. In prehistoric times (and still today for the millions of those that are living on the edge) we lived for the now moment, each day, live or die.

In business I learned to plan ahead and have created elaborate focus, planning and progress measuring systems – but in my private life, I simply want to go home, chill out, listen to radio 4 and drink a glass of white wine in the sunshine – all the rest is an unwelcome interruption ;-)

Love Harley xxx

I know my mother, I know she’s going to reply “Harley, stop theorising and just get on with it, if you follow my advice – you won’t have to even cut the grass yourself , you lazy swine!“

If my wife reads this blog, I'll have to go and borrow my neighbours lawn mower and I'll spend my sunny Saturday cutting grass - I need an excuse, quick!

You might find this piece of advice a bit strange, especially coming from me, perhaps some explanation is called for?

When I was younger, when people came to me for advice, I listened for a while and then told them what I thought. Sometimes my enquirers would smile and say encouraging words along the lines of “thanks that’s great advice, just what I needed to hear.” If I happened to meet my enquirer again sometime later, more often than not, it was pretty obvious that my advice had not worked.

If someone gives you advice and you find yourself saying “Wow, that’s so obvious, why hadn’t I thought of it before?” Then don’t trust the advice – it probably is too simple. Listen to it, play it over again in your head, test it, ask others what they think – but whatever you do, do not follow it blindly – your advisor can not possibly know the complexity that surrounds your issues, unless they know you better than you do?

The reasons we ask for advice are many fold. The next time you find yourself asking for advice, stop and ask yourself these two questions first: ‘Why am I asking this person for advice?’ And ‘Once I receive my answer how will it help me solve my problem?’.

Let’s consider five common reasons why we ask for advice:

1. Because we are too lazy to work it out for ourselves
2. Because we like the personal attention we receive
3. Because we think wise people can solve anything
4. Because we are too close to the issue to think and act rationally
5. Because we like to have confirmed what we already know

I often ask others for advice, mostly my wife:
“Does this jacket go with these trousers?”
“Do you find this blog too long?”
“Should I see a doctor about my back?”
“If I mentioned it to her, do you think she would understand?”
“Is it worth cutting the grass, I am sure it is going to rain?”

Ok, so my requests for advice are pretty crass but think about it, mostly we ask for advice in the hope that our advisor will tell us something that we want to hear – to reconfirm our own beliefs. So when we hear what we want to hear we like it even more when we consider our advisor to be as wise as can be.

If we truly desire advice to solve a problem, especially a business problem (which by their very nature are often complex), it is mostly because of reason number 4: Because we are too close to the issue to think and act rationally. In this case, it is most likely, that unless we brief our advisor for at least 200 hours or more, the chances are they will be guessing at a solution. That is why, if you have a serious problem, it really is best to go through at least the first four steps of my nine step methodology for solving problems, before asking someone outside for advice:

Step 1: What is the real problem?
(Understanding and defining the current situation – separating the symptoms from the root causes)
Step 2: How did I (or the business) get to where I am today?
(Looking at the past to understand how the current situation came about)
Step 3: Cash, Culture and Competence
(Assessing the resources at our disposal)
Step 4: What are my (or the business’) aspirations?
(Understanding our long term desires and/or the long term objectives of the business, to be sure any solution will be in line with them).

These four steps take some effort and talking them through with others who know us, can help - but asking for advice as what to do (Step 5 Decision Time) – is something best done on your own. However! Once you have made a decision, it always a very good idea to share it with others for their opinion, if the majority of those you speak with disagree with you, then think twice and ask yourself again – “why have I decided on this solution?” - before you act upon it (especially if our actions will impact on others).

Remember, there is a big difference for asking for advice when one is lost, than asking for advice to confirm where we are. A powerful leader has only one councellor (advisor) for each topic, but many colleagues with whom to debate. There is a difference.

If you’re looking for advice, my door is always open, have a good week ;-)

When I was a young man, fresh out of college, I was undecided as to how best to earn a living. In 1978, my dreams of being a singer songwriter were fading fast and an impending income tax bill for my student earnings were both forcing me to make a quick decision. One afternoon I stepped into an employment agency in London to see what they had on their books. After challenging me with a number of questions the recruiter suggested I apply for a position with the agency itself. Three interviews later, I found myself taking part in an intensive training course at the Brook Street Bureau academy. During the following five days I learnt everything from employment law right down to how to answer the telephone.

The amazing thing about the Brook Street Bureau course was that, thirty years later, I still apply a number of the lessons learned every working day.

Key learning’s:

1. People are both surprising and flexible (they often do not actually want what they ask for, they just think they do)
2. A warm and friendly phone manner will open many more doors than you can imagine
3. Smiling, although it can take some effort, is a prerequisite to a happy life and a successful and happy office environment
4. Always end your correspondence with a friendly but courteous closer
5. Never ask “can I help you? but always “how may I help you?”

But that’s not all, in that classroom of ambitious dreamers, I learned the absolute secret to success. Imagine the scene:
The head trainer was deep into her let’s get them motivated routine when she rose the tempo and excitement level to the absolute highest possible pitch, at that precise moment she asked: “What is the absolute secret to success?”
Silence fell in the class room, we were tense and excited waiting for the one piece of wisdom that would make us rich and successful. Two rows behind me, a young man, a little older than the rest of us, muttered a reply; “don’t’ get caught!”
“Pardon?” demanded the trainer, “don’t be shy speak up, share your answer with the group”. Obviously, when the very embarrassed contributor reluctantly repeated his answer, the effect was very unwelcome and his cynical comment ruined the trainer’s flow. However it did get a rather nervous laugh from some of the audience, including me.
“No, no, no!” the trainer retorted, “The absolute secret to success is: Do it now! Don’t put off today what can be done tomorrow but DO IT NOW! Follow this simple rule and you won’t go far wrong in your office or indeed in your entire career.”

So there you have it, the answer to the absolute secret of success. Pick one of the two, or take them both: ‘don’t get caught’ and/or ‘do it now’. I took the second and so far, it has worked fine for me…